Thanksgiving dinner with my boyfriend's family

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by totalbeliever, Nov 7, 2017.

  1. totalbeliever

    totalbeliever MDL Junior Member

    Oct 22, 2015
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    Hi guys. I need help. My boyfriend just invited me to spend Thanksgiving dinner with his family. This is going to be the first time that I will spend more time with them. I am a bit nervous about what to do -- like what's the proper behavior, dress to wear, etc. Geez, I know I sound too much but I can't shake off the anxiety.
     
  2. Threat

    Threat Lord of the Files

    Feb 23, 2014
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    The correct procedure is to go dressed like a $2 whore :)
     
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  3. dhjohns

    dhjohns MDL Guru

    Sep 5, 2013
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    Ask your boyfriend how his family dresses for Thanksgiving. Probably nice casual. Don't worry if you are nervous. It is normal. You will be fine.
     
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  4. John Sutherland

    John Sutherland MDL Addicted

    Oct 15, 2014
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    Avoid mixing Jack Daniels and cranberry sauce, unless you're trying to set the world's distance record for projectile vomiting.
     
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  5. Threat

    Threat Lord of the Files

    Feb 23, 2014
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    You sound like your talking from experience there?
     
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  6. John Sutherland

    John Sutherland MDL Addicted

    Oct 15, 2014
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    I hold the world's record. And nobody is going to take it away from me.
     
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  7. totalbeliever

    totalbeliever MDL Junior Member

    Oct 22, 2015
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  8. wyatt23

    wyatt23 MDL Member

    Apr 2, 2017
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    #8 wyatt23, Nov 8, 2017
    Last edited: Nov 8, 2017
    Dinner with the inlaws,,,

    If you walk into the house/trailer/whatever and you brain screams "REDNECKS" LEAVE IMMEDIATELY.

    Be polite.

    Dressing like you've just finished a shift at Hooters will have 2 effects. The mother will think you are a tramp and the father will wish he was 20 again.

    Farting. If you need to fart then go outside even if there is 6 foot of snow and stand well away from the door. I did that once and my brother in law opened the door and said we heard that. Damn. Avoid any food that makes you fart. I did this one christmas dinner and spent the whole afternoon in a putrid cloud wetting myself laughing.

    Have your daily power poo before you go and for crying out loud never EVER leave a floater.

    Offer to help mother in the kitchen and take an interest even if you think she cant cook for schitt.

    Take an interest in fathers gun/nascar memorabilia/whatever collections. If father offers to play the banjo or show you his Jeff Foxworthy CD collection, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY.

    Dont tread on the cat.

    Feed the dog titbits from your plate, the dog will be your friend for life and even if the parents dont like you they will say you must be ok because the dog likes you.

    Make a fuss of any old relatives. They may stink of urine but they wont live much longer and will tell parents you are a nice girl.

    Make a fuss of any young siblings. They may be annoying little schitts and have you reaching for the alcohol so dose the little darlings up with sugary drinks and foods so the little demons are fully primed just as you leave.

    Practice your fellatio technique until you reach olympic gold level so that no matter how much the family hate you he will never leave you.

    So what if they dont like you, you get a free dinner with as much booze as you can drink.
     
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  9. R29k

    R29k MDL GLaDOS

    Feb 13, 2011
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    :eek: the post above is rated R
     
  10. Joe C

    Joe C MDL Guru

    Jan 12, 2012
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    R.... is for redneck

    and do not mention that one of the tires are missing under the house
     
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  11. Mr.X

    Mr.X MDL Guru

    Jul 14, 2013
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    This is rated PG, pure gold... :roflmao:
     
  12. R29k

    R29k MDL GLaDOS

    Feb 13, 2011
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    Tired tires that's why you use tyres